First, make sure that you read the other person’s profile!  There is a wealth of information in their profile, for example, their wants and don’ts.  When I was in the dating environment, I once responded to an online profile, and it turned out that the person was a transgender (male to a female) individual.  I apologize for sending that message when I was not interested in dating a transgender individual.  Then you fully read each profile; you can find some golden nuggets of commonality like you visit the same countries or similar interests.  These can be conversational points of interest in the communication ice breakers.  Think of how your friends see you.  Referring to their hobbies, pictures, or occupation in your message shows that you have put time into reading their profile and have taken a genuine interest in them.  Don’t forget to let your personality shine through!  If you’re the funny guy, then slip in a tasteful joke.  Let that come across if you’re poetic, artistic, or creative.

 

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Daters seek friendly, approachable, and easy to talk to singles.  Your tone in your first message sets the tone of the first communication.  The first message should be entertaining and engaging; leave the serious things to 4 or 5 dates in the future.  Talking about how you haven’t dated since your last break-up or how you’re ready to have kids like yesterday isn’t a great opener.  Keeping things fun and upbeat is the best way to get a response.

 

Most people don’t wish to read a book via your first message to them; most don’t read at all and prefer to watch a video.  If you decide to write a book for your first message, it most likely will not be read unless it is entertaining and captivate the reader.  Your first message to a dater must entice the recipient to view your profile and become interested in getting to know you.

 

Everyone loves to hear about how great they are, and compliments go long.  However, most attractive people always hear “You Are Beautiful,” so give compliments creatively.  Asking the other person something (about their description, pictures, life, career, favorite things to do, etc.) gives them some material to respond with and takes the pressure off finding something to talk about during the first conversation.

 

Most people want to hear themselves speak, so it is important to be a good listener.  When you listen more, you learn more about other people.  The first conversations made these talks fun and energized.

 

Be sure to end your initial communication by letting the user know you’re excited to hear back from them!

 

 

 

I know the start of a conversation with someone new can be difficult, so here are some suggestions you can discuss during a first conversation.  It helps to break the ice!  lol

 

1.  Reflecting on your life, describe one event you wish you had handled differently.  This life event could have changed your life for the better today!

 

2.  Who was your role model growing up, and why?

 

3.  What is your biggest fear in life?

 

4.  If you had an opportunity to have lunch with three people, alive or deceased, well known or not, who would it be and why?

 

5.  If you could go back in time, what would be the one piece of advice you would give your younger self?

 

6.  What does your dream life look like to you?

 

7.  What makes you happy?

 

8.  What are your favorite things to do by yourself and within a relationship?  What are the things that make you happy?  What is the best gift you feel you gave in your last relationship?

 

9.  If you won $100,000 today, how would you do it?

 

10.  Where do you see yourself in 5, 10, and 15 years from now?

 

11.  What was your experience on your first date?  What would you wish you could have changed about that date?

 

12.  What or Where is the most romantic place you have been or visited?

 

13.  What is your dream vacation?

 

14.  What is your Love Language?

 

15.  What is most important to you Love, Money, Time, Companionship, or Sex?

 

16.  What is the Biggest Influence you have in your life growing up?

17.  What is most important to you when finding a mate, companion, or life partner?

 

18.  What Is your favorite color?

 

19.  What was the last movie you watched that made you laugh, excited you, and made you reflect on life?

 

20.  How often do you take a self-care day?  What do you like to do to re-energize yourself?

 

Now that you have some ideas for communicating with other people, get started today!

 

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